🤗WHAT’S YOUR O.A.T?

🤗WHAT’S YOUR O.A.T?

Okay— it’s time. Let’s go deep for some candid talk.

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I figured if my daughter can try and get her own Papa to converse and open up with her when he is exhausted after a long day—I could push myself to open up and write candidly about some recent questions we’ve been getting about our book and Ella’s part in it.

…perfect example of how I am always learning from my child.

So—my husband told me (a couple of nights ago after our daughter Ella was asleep)—that on their way back from Home Depot—she asked, “Papa, what’s your O.A.T. for today?”

He said to me, “Has she ever asked YOU this question? Do you even know what it is?”

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She hadn’t and—I didn’t.

He told me that Ella explained his O.A.T. to be his ‘ONE AWESOME THING’ that had happened during his day and- that she’d hoped he would share it with her.  [Widget_Twitter id=”1″]

I couldn’t stop smiling. Her own young mind was looking for ways to connect with her exhausted and hard-working Papa. She was discerning enough to recall this Acronym ‘strategy’  from one of her recent reads where a character was trying to encourage a friend in the story to communicate.

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When she and I talked the next morning— I couldn’t help but express my enthusiasm at her loving efforts to engage authentically with her Papa and—as always, find a meaningful way to connect.

She has learned to appreciate putting forth the effort to reach out to others and truly understand what’s important to them. She does it because she cares—not for any accolades. She only knows that it feels good to connect with others genuinely and based on what matters to them.

💜THAT!!!💜

💜THAT- RIGHT THERE, WAS WHY I KNEW I HAD TO WRITE THIS POST💜

***

More than a few times, since our Mother-Daughter Book was published— we’ve had questions…no—actually, I think comments is a more appropriate word for most of them.

—“It seems a little far-fetched that your daughter would really say the things in her book or in her blogs.”

—“Kids don’t usually express themselves in that way.”

—“Your daughter’s writing as if she’s an adult. Are those her own words or did you change them?”

—“I find Ella’s overly articulate word choice somewhat intriguing at such a young age.”

—“Kids just don’t usually express themselves that way.”

—“Those words seems a bit deep for a seven year old.”

***

So there it was—our “Fearless, Think-Different Self-Discovery Guide” had been put to the test yet again. Maybe that’s why we felt the need to write the post on Madeleine L’Engle last week. You’ll get what I mean if you read it.

It seems the right moment to clear the air.

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The words: genuine and authentic—we take them deeply to heart on every imaginable level. So I thought about the comments stated by others above—trying to understand them—even examine them from a different perspective.

I had only ever seen Ella for who she really is and never once considered the thought that others might question this reality.

Here is my effort to express consideration for the comments above and maybe we can all work at opening our eyes to any limiting thought patterns when it comes to kids. Children are naturally—highly intelligent and eager learners when their innate passions are fostered and encouraged. What is so disappointing is the lack of willingness some have to even consider the complexities and higher potential of a child’s mind. We as adults could take lessons from our own children.

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It would seem easier sometimes to ‘brush something off’ that ‘APPEARS’ TOO PROFOUND to be real, maybe even just see it as an anomaly- or worse—a falsified reality.

What a disservice we do to ourselves and our kids—missing out on all that can be learned between adult and child through good-old-fashioned interactions of a deeper sort.

Just like all families out there trying to do their best- we have more than plenty of our own struggles as a family. Isn’t that just life?
When you take the off-roads journey of learning together as a family, your being risk takers by the simple fact that you are not following the cycle of social conformity. Your willingness to take the chance and open up to each other in deeper ways—naturally brings about a higher level of thinking and interacting.

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However—this heightened thinking also opens up a child’s higher awareness and sensitivity to things going on in the word and with the people around them. This alertness—the very thing that leads to the depth of connectedness, creates heightened mindfulness and a stronger moral compass. Kids living this deeply connected life- have a much keener sense of their surroundings and the people they meet. They can ascertain when something seems inauthentic or unjust.

Ella senses things about others actions, good intentions and even their lack thereof. She thinks about people with wonder and curiosity. She loves people and is perceptive. That wisdom allows her to know herself and what makes her feel comfortable, what does not—and… what principles she wants guiding her life.

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So, that’s the answer—as best as I can say. These are the reasons why Ella expresses herself the way she does in her writing. This discernment of the truth around her—grounds her in a strong sense of right or even when something seems inconsistent with her moral upbringing. When we wrote another recent post about the meaning of the word MOTIVES- she had many questions (which prompted not only the dialogue but the writing of the post). The questions stemmed from her confusion over people’s actions, inconsistencies and intentions. It is taking those questions, the words themselves— and converting them into fuel to bring about understanding. As her mom I would be remiss in not attempting to help her understand the meaning of the depths of humanity, even if some parts can never be fully understood. That’s deep—but would I deny her that conversation when she has already made such observations? No- not a chance. Real talk is hard- but the value it brings spans a lifetime.

Well, I think the best way for me to conclude is this: Why define Ella’s reasoning or form of expression with some label or term—or even brush it off, as impossibly hers. Instead, let’s just try to welcome the opportunity for this possibility with all of our children.

Maybe a good way to start would be asking your family members about their own O.A.T.!

If your family begins an off-roads journey of self-discovery and is hoping to live a life beyond merely what “the institution” offers—Be Fearless! Be prepared to accept & embrace the beautiful nuances that come with this life. You won’t regret it—as any old shackles seem to fall right off and you see things you didn’t believe were possible.

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